Breakups are one of the most painful experiences that a person can face in their lifetime. Of course, some breakups are worse than others. A 20-year marriage ending in divorce will usually feel more painful than a 3-month relationship ending in separation.
Regardless, it can be very traumatic because not only do you suddenly face loneliness, but you also see the person that you fell in love with slowly fade away. It can be challenging to see someone you love walk away, leaving you feeling heartbroken.
However, many people are happy after a breakup. They attribute their happiness to knowing they learned from the breakup and growing as a person. Sometimes, a breakup can help someone find true happiness.
Try these steps to find happiness after a painful breakup:
- Release your ex. It would be best to let go of your ex as quickly as possible. Letting go will help you reclaim your space in your own life and make it more difficult for your ex to influence you negatively.
- Letting go of your ex will also stop them from making you feel bad by bringing up the past.
- Some people assume they’ve let go, but in reality, they have stayed stuck in what happened during the breakup and haven’t moved on. You’re the only person who can tell if you’ve truly let go of the past.
2. Hang out with those who love and cherish you. Often, after a breakup, people bury themselves in work in an attempt to block anyone from contacting them and creating any awkward situations or feeling bad about not having contact with the ex.
- Unfortunately, this only makes you feel lonelier than you were before the breakup. We all need people to love and care for us. Spending time with your loved ones will bolster your self-confidence and make you feel good about yourself.3. Consider volunteering at something that inspires you. Many people who volunteer do so because they want to make a difference in the world.
- Volunteering allows you to help others without expecting anything in return, and it provides you with an opportunity to make new friends, among other benefits.
- Helping others also helps you to feel good about yourself since you feel good about serving others4.Resist the need to adopt self-sabotaging behavior. Self-sabotage can wreak havoc on your self-esteem and confidence, so you must combat the urge to sabotage yourself after a relationship ends.
- Self-sabotage can manifest in emotional eating, over-exercising, binge eating, smoking, drinking, not writing in your journal, and so on. Realize that you deserve so much more than staying stuck in an unhealthy relationship with yourself.
5. Banish the thought that your ex was “the one.” Many people who enter relationships think that they have finally found their soulmate.
- While it’s true that there was something special about your ex, these thoughts only hinder you from healing because you’ll constantly compare any new relationship to your former one.6. Work to declutter your life both within and out. Clutter is emotional baggage that your soul is holding onto. Cleaning out the clutter makes it so much easier to move forward in your life and do the things that you want to do.
- Look at all the belongings in your closet and donate everything you don’t use to a nearby charity.7. Resist the urge to date people because they’re opposite your ex in every way. While it’s healthy to be with someone different from your ex, overdoing it can adversely affect you.
- A devastating breakup can influence you never to date someone like your ex again. Making such a conscious decision is a knee-jerk response and is the opposite of letting go and moving on.
If you were on the receiving end of a breakup, you might feel like you’ve been cheated out of something good by your ex. However, this doesn’t mean that there’s anything wrong with you.
Letting go and moving on can help you attract others into your life who might make you happier than your ex did.