If we had a dollar for every time a couple in therapy said, “We have nothing in common anymore,” “She doesn’t like my company,” “We’re in a rut,” “I have more fun with my friends,” then we’d be writing this from a tropical island. Yes, relationships take work, but it doesn’t have to be painful. Spicing it up and reminding ourselves why we’re with this fool is powerful stuff.
Yes, relationships take work, but it doesn’t have to be painful. Spicing it up and reminding ourselves why we’re with this fool is powerful stuff.
Many of our therapy clients lament the boredom or staleness of their couple time. One example we hear repeatedly is couples don’t have any joint activity that doesn’t involve alcohol. It may be fine to hang out together drinking at a bar or with friends, but to have couple-time limited to alcohol-fueled activities can get boring or unhealthy. We’ve come up with 8 fresh ideas to liven up your together time:
1. Go on a hike – many of us don’t realize hiking is just walking. Yep, that’s it. Sometimes with a little nature involved, but not necessarily any hills. Our favorite hikes are to coffee shops and wine bars.
2. Go bowling or miniature golfing. Yes, it may feel hokey or retro, but it can also be funny, silly and a good laugh.
3. Pretend you’ve just met a bar in the next town over. Introduce yourselves, flirt, pretend. There may even be a hotel nearby to spice it up.
4. Take a Sunday drive, find a great restaurant an hour away with a great Yelp review. No screens on the drive mean it is a wonderful time to share music, a podcast, or dreams for retirement.
5. Get on stubhub.com. Live music is like nothing else and there is something for everyone. It could be low key folk music at a local bar, the Rolling Stones who are still touring, or anything in-between.
6. Visit the town next door’s sex shop. Seriously, it’s not just funny, it is fascinating and quite impressive.
7. Go to Vegas! It’s cheap. Enough said.
8. Rent a Vespa, a bicycle, a paddle board, a Segway, scooter, whatever . . . .
As the old Nike slogan goes, Just Do It!