Balance & Lifestyle / From the Editor / Lifestyle / Self-confidence

When You Compare Yourself to Others You Lose Your Personal Power

6 Tips to Help You Compare Less and Celebrate More

“Comparison is the root of all feelings of inferiority. The moment you begin examining other people’s strengths against your most obvious weaknesses, your self-esteem starts to crumble.” ―James C. Dobson
Life on the Edge: The Next Generation’s Guide to a Meaningful Future

You are different from everyone else. Celebrate that. You offer a unique perspective in this game called life. We should all be thanking you. If you are constantly comparing yourself, it means you aren’t happy with who you are. Why is that?

People are brought up to conform to society. If you don’t fit within society’s norms, you are looked upon disapprovingly. However, most people aren’t normal in the truest sense of the word. Everyone has quirks and idiosyncrasies. It’s these differences that allow us to find solutions to problems. It also keeps us from getting bored. Imagine if everyone were truly the same. There would be nothing new to discover about one another.

There are some reasons to conform. For instance, you need to follow the rules and laws of your country and community. Otherwise, you will suffer consequences for not doing so. Also, you want to treat others with respect so that they will hopefully return that respect. However, if you try to act in ways in which others believe you should, you aren’t going to live your life to the fullest.

That’s why you should get out of the habit of comparing yourself to others. When you do this, you are likely setting unrealistic expectations and will lead you to be disappointed. Comparing yourself to others will result in you resenting those people. They have their reasons for being the way they are, and it has nothing to do with you. Don’t waste your time chasing after other people’s successes. Find your own passion. Remember…

“…Every flower blooms at a different pace. Excel at doing what your passion is and only focus on perfecting it. Eventually people will see what you are great at doing, and if you are truly great, success will come chasing after you.” ―Suzy Kassem, Rise Up and Salute the Sun

There will always be qualities you admire in others. There is nothing wrong with trying to adopt some of those admirable qualities for yourself. However, it shouldn’t get to the point where you are trying to redefine who you are to be like those people you admire. You aren’t them, and you never will be.

Here are 6 Tips to Help You Compare Less and Celebrate More:

  • Think about the things that trigger those feelings of comparison. Learn to avoid those things. If social media is making you feel small, spend less time there.
  • Don’t focus on those things you don’t have, spend time being grateful for all the good.
  • If you must compare, use that as a motivator to better your life, to improve those things in your life that matter.
  • Even if someone looks happy and successful on the outside, never assume their life is perfect or better. Often successful people are fighting their own battles.
  • Be okay with who you are, imperfections and all. In fact, celebrate those imperfections for they are what make you who you are, uniquely you.
  • Focus on your strengths, on your goals and look towards your own future.

The important thing is to be a better person today than you were yesterday. Compare yourself today to who you were yesterday and the day before…

Remember that you have but a short time on this planet. If you spend most of that time trying to be like someone else, you are in for a rough ride. If you stick to who you are and find others willing to accept you for that, you are going to be more satisfied for most of that time you live. Others will be happier with the real you as well. You won’t be a pretender. People see right through that kind of behavior. Just think about others who are not true to themselves. How long does it take you to see through that disguise?

When you compare yourself to others you chip away at your personal power, little by little, you give it away. Focus on your strengths.

Do your best and stand in your power.

“Comparison is waste of energy. Every individual is unique with unique talents. Find your passion and live your best life.” Lailah Gifty Akita

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