By Maria Mar

"permission to achieve"If you are working hard to obtain your dream or goals, why aren’t you there yet? What may be keeping you stuck at the threshold ~unable to cross over into your dream~ could be that you are not giving yourself permission to ACHIEVE what you want.

Women have been socialized to serve. But to ACHIEVE involves not only giving to others, but giving yourself the attention, recognition and reward that you deserve and desire.

If your dream is to be a great mother, for example, but you are unable to RECOGNIZE or RECEIVE all the ways in which you already are a good mother, then you are not able to achieve your dream because you are repelling your achievement.

Perception creates reality. If you are not able to perceive your achievement, then it is not real for you. It does not matter that your children, your spouse, friends and family all tell you that you are a great mother. It does not even matter that you intellectually know that you are a good mother.

Misa Hopkins , the best-selling author of The Root of all Healing, teaches people the art of self-healing. Misa shares the magical and funny story of the day she learned the importance of recognizing her own achievements. At the time this story takes place, Misa had already taken courageous leaps of faith to manifest a life that delivered her life purpose. But nothing seemed to happen.

“I was praying and praying for a path of knowledge and awakening geared to the feminine,” Misa remembers. “I had seen that many of the spiritual paths available were great, but were too modeled in the masculine. So I prayed for guidance, and nothing seemingly happened.”

“All the while, the Medicine Bowl I had received, which contained the secrets of the Sacred Feminine, sat underneath my old fashion sewing machine, right in my bedroom! In my mind, I was holding this sacred bowl until someone showed up. In my mind I saw myself as the keeper of the bowl for someone else.”

“Spirit must have gotten tired of hearing my prayers and trying to tell me that they had already been answered, so Spirit sent a messenger. One day someone saw the bowl and flat out told me that I was not holding that bowl for anyone else. ‘This came for you because these old rites of the Sacred Feminine are dying and they are coming back through you.’”

You too may be exhausting yourself with every conceivable action you can take to manifest your dream. But no external validation, knowledge or External Action supersedes your unconscious and the Internal Actions it is undertaking.

External Actions are actions you take in the world to externalize what is inside you. An External Action takes an idea inside you and implements it, manifesting it outside of you. External Actions belong to your Sacred Masculine, or Shiva Power. They are logical, physical and executive.

Internal Actions are emotional, intentional and energy processes within you that generate the alchemy of change in your subconscious. Internal Actions sustain or transmute the energy patterns that create your life. Internal Actions belong to your Sacred Feminine or Shakti Power. They are intuitive, creative, emotional and alchemical.

Misa had done everything she could think of, including praying. But she had not realized that her prayers had been answered because ~though the tool with the knowledge she had requested had arrived~ she had not yet PERCEIVED or RECEIVED her achievement.

The Universe sends you scouts, allies and messengers. It delivers the tools and signs to help you achieve. But if you do not RECOGNIZE or RECEIVE what is given to you or what you attract, then you simply ignore your own achievement.

It was Misa’s willingness to “seat with it” and to “listen” that allowed the message to finally break through. It was her willingness to RECEIVE the bowl that allowed her to finally manifest her dream. Once she did these three Internal Actions, she found out that she already had what she was praying for!

Limiting Beliefs and emotions create Internal Actions that may secretly sabotage your dreams and goals. Here are two limiting beliefs that often steal women’s achievements and two Internal Actions that help you to emotionally recognize your achievements.

LIMITING BELIEF: Have you learned to see self-recognition, self-fulfillment and self-satisfaction as selfish? This belief creates the Internal Action of repelling any internalization of your achievements.

Internal Action: When you give thanks for the gifts bestowed on your life and loved ones, also practice gratitude for the gifts given to you. Recognizing your merits is a way of receiving these gifts. It is part of the practice of gratitude. How can you be grateful for gifts that you do not even perceive or recognize?

LIMITING FEELING: Do you feel that when you give attention to yourself or your dream you are stealing it from others? In this case, recognizing your achievements feels like the evidence of your crime of selfishness.

INTERNAL ACTION: Recognize that the door you open for yourself stays open for all others who follow.

The instant you give yourself Emotional Recognition for your achievement, you will quickly cross the threshold to your dream.


Free Ebook Series. I have compiled the Seven Basic Permissions to Succeed in a series of free ebooks. To immediately enjoy the first ebook and be notified of the other six ebooks in the series, which come out once a month, subscribe here.

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Maria Mar is an author, poet, healer and spiritual teacher whose life mission is to inspire you to achieve personal freedom, unlock your creative potential and live a life of magic and delight. A PBS-featured performer and visual artist, Maria has freed her vast creative potential and helps you do the same, designing a life and work experience that fulfills your soul’s purpose. Maria marries her artistry and imagination with her wisdom and energy tools as a shaman to offer powerful tools for self-transformation, healing and manifestation. If you are interested in mentoring with Maria Mar, visit