"big Red Bow"If you have to experience the controversial and privacy-invasive full body security scan now being used at some U.S. airports, you might have a brand new special request at the top of your wish list this Christmas…radiation shielding undies!

The resourceful folks at Rocky Flats Gear, http://www.rockyflatsgear.com/, are the US manufacturer of a radiation shielding garment for individuals, with an emphasis on protecting the traveling public from radiation generated by security equipment…and they have a sense of humour too! The men’s briefs are available with a strategically placed fig leaf and the women’s briefs have a pair of clasped hands demurely shielding enquiring eyes. Of course, women’s protective bras are also available.

Both men’s and women’s undergarments are available in a variety of colours and sizes and, yup, there are even kid’s undies too! I can barely contain myself – see me biting my tongue here?

There are 2 types of briefs for both men and women – one with a token of a fig leaf and one that protects just about everything you keep inside you from your waist down, depending on how shy or paranoid you might be. Prices for basic bashfulness are $17.76 for demure women and $19.84 for modest men.

But before you make your final choice, check out the special packages – both men and women can buy a ‘Threat Level’ package that has 5 pair of briefs in 5 colours (Five Fun Colors: Red, Orange, Yellow, Green and Blue) to match the Homeland Security Threat Level of the day and the website graciously provides a link to the Homeland Security website so you can coordinate properly on your day of travel. Now that’s funny! Men’s briefs also come in a Patriot Pack of red, white and blue for $49.00. I guess women in the U.S. aren’t very patriotic. More tongue biting.

I think this company has shown amazing ingenuity, tempered with a lot of humour! Good for them for 1) cashing in on one of the hottest controversies and 2) making fun of the Federal Transportation Security Administration. I’m tempted to order a pair or two just to be in on all the fun and to voice my ridicule at this incredible over-reaction by Homeland Security. Come on guys; get a grip will ya?


Of course we all want secure flights, but this blanket application of the thinking that everyone is a suspect is kind of Orwellian, Animal Farm-ish, isn’t it? What if your 90 year old spinster Aunt Hazel or bachelor Uncle Felix had to submit to this? Wouldn’t that be just wrong to think of someone looking at something only Hazel or Felix had seen for the past 90 years? Isn’t that kind of an ‘ew’ moment? A picture that you never want to have in your mind, let alone in the mind of some security person at an airport?

So if I’m on your gift list this Christmas, you know what to give me. There’s nothing like briefs with a sense of humour for that discerning person on your gift list!


©Marcia Barhydt 2011

This article is excerpted from the Holiday Gift Guide for 2011 . Be sure and check it out and read other articles about the holidays. It’s also great to add to your online shopping experience! While you are at it check out Oneness perfume by Shawn Rae and Eve’s Apples Lingerie in case you still want to send the “sexy underwear)! (Click on the ad to see the full version)

Oneness Perfume









Eve's Apples