CREATIVITY AND CREATIVE EXPRESSION are essential tools for building passion and desire in relationships. Many of us naturally reveal our greatest creative potential in the early stages of a relationship. We offer new ideas, we plan unusual and fun activities and we often say enticing words verbally or through text messages. But the key is to continually express and develop our creativity so that we are in the flow of life, sharing our excitement and interest with others. You may have a strong incentive, intention, drive, commitment and even a high level of trust, but without nurturing your creative expression your relationship can easily become routine, tedious and even boring.
The question is:
Do YOU regularly use your imagination to create a new and exciting vision that continues to inspire you and those in relationship with you?
- Do you have original approaches and adequate resources available to help you overcome problems and create excitement and a sense of adventure in your relationships?
- Do you strive to find new ways to communicate and do you often take unusual and unexpected actions that surprise and delight yourself and others?
- Are you an original, innovative and inspirational partner or do you easily accept the status quo without striving for more?
Ask yourself NOW: In what ways am I expressing my CREATIVITY?
CREATIVITY is an essential aspect of life. When we stop dreaming and imagining and expressing our creative potentials, we lose the spark and excitement and spontaneity that makes life exciting and filled with adventure.
Relationships are built upon the complexity and interactions among all the different possible qualities, both positive and negative, that each person expresses and shares. Every quality is important, to some degree. It is really the specific balance of traits and actions among all the different possibilities that can lead to joy and happiness or sadness and emotional devastation.
Here’s a simple example. Tom and Heather have been together for almost 6 years. Although they hug and snuggle up together often, their sexual intimacy had begun to wane. When Tom attempted to arouse Heather’s desire, she would often pull away and run off to attend to some other activity (e.g., finishing the dishes, doing laundry, paying bills). Feeling frustrated and neglected, Tom spent an increasing amount of time connecting with others, including women, on his favorite social media sites. He had found what he thought was an innocent way to get his needs met without disturbing Heather. But in a short period of time his connections with others started to escalate. Finally, he actually made plans to meet one of his Facebook friends at a local bar.
Luckily for this couple, Tom was out of the room with his computer on and Heather just happened to see his latest conversation with this other woman online. Of course, their conversation began with a huge fight, accusations, anger and even rage. But soon that settled down and they began to communicate.
They needed to find a creative way to deal with their current relationship impasse. It turns out that Heather had been feeling increasingly angry with Tom because he was not handling chores, expecting her to just do them. Tom had been frustrated with Heather’s resistance to his sexual approaches, so he stopped helping her out around the house.
Their first solution was to plan a weekend away from the situation that was bothering them. During that weekend they planned to have fun, to not argue and to remind each other about what had brought them together. As they reminisced about their early dates, they felt that same tingling excitement with each other. Heather’s desire was back and Tom was beaming with delight. But both were wise enough to realize that without further conversation, they might just return to their familiar routine when they were back at home.
They agreed upon a creative solution. Each one promised to do something just to please the other at least once/week, and even more often if possible. Tom started sending sexy text messages to Heather in the middle of the day, telling her how much he loves her and promising to help her with whatever it is that she wants. Heather found ways to tease him with words and sexy outfits. Both were getting what they want and the resistance and fighting was over.
It may just take a small change, tweaking your attitude or your behavior in such a way that your partner feels validated, loved and appreciated. Practice developing your creative imagination. Apply your creativity to all the confusing, difficult and special moments in your relationship. And watch the magic unfold.
Have you found creative ways to overcome apparent problems and impasses in your relationships? Please share your experiences and techniques in the comments below.