As much as we may look like Wonder Woman, or so as not to be sexist, Superman, and feel like them too, we cannot be a one person band and expect that the everything will just fall into place. It’ll fall alright, down, into bed, if you make it that far, from exhaustion.

A smart and successful small biz owner has back up, and I’d love to share my back up tricks honed from trial and error throughout the years that have saved me countless hours of unproductive work.

One of the best tips I’ve gotten to be constantly reminding ourselves of what is a time waster and what is a productive money making action for our day is from the wonderful business coach Jane Pollak, that goes like this: when creating your day to day tasks, use a green marker and mark which daily tasks are your business growth, money making tasks, and which are not. I usually make my list and then mark the moneymaking tasks with a green dot. If nothing else this will be a wake up call. Are you wasting way too much time on your proposals? There’s a system for that! Are you crunching all your numbers yourself for an hour a day? No need for that! Invoicing taking too long? There are a number of great programs for that.

Here’s my top 5 time saving and either free or really inexpensive systems, as I am a tightwad when it comes to these things… all designed to free you up so you can spend your day tackling the big stuff:

1) A really intuitive invoicing system: I use Freshbooks. Not only does it invoice really easily, but it sends them either by snail mail or email, does all kinds of cool numbers crunching, runs reports, allows you to send estimates that can convert to an invoice, and so much more. Bookkeeping — which I personally can’t stand to do so this forces me to do it in a fun and quick way — made easy, and quick. A nominal cost well worth the expense. Allows for customization as well

2) A proposal/Contract system — which used to take me half a day to do — try Quotegine. It allows you to create, save, customize and re-use templates in a library, sends it out with a click of a button and allows for an e signature on your clients end so that they don’t even have to print out, excepting for themselves or mail, attach, or fax back. Just pressing a button lands it back in your hands within a fraction of the time it would take otherwise, allowing you to get going on your next project. Free up until a certain amount of clients, and again, allows you to white label it.

3) A CRM system, otherwise known as a Contact Relationship Management System. Other wise known as a database. If you’re not already on Outlook, look no further than cloud based Highrise, run by the same cool, uber smart folks who created Freshbooks. If you are using your email contacts list as your database I might have to come over there and smack you. Highrise has all the bells and whistles you could ask for to allow you to keep on top of all of your prospects, clients and important business affiliates and contacts in an organized manner, create and schedule tasks and have them appear in your inbox when they come due, as a reminder to ‘get on that!’ It can also be synced with Freshbooks so that your whole client profile, jobs as well as the payments and invoicing are under one heading.

4) Housecleaning! I know that this involves money, but again, if you are trying to be all things to all people including a family of 4 back home, something is going to cave if you’re working hard all day and then expected to come home and clean the house as well. Even if you bring someone in just once per month to do the heavy cleaning, or pay your kids to do it. A scary thought I know. The money you spend here will make itself up to you in ROI if you’re taking the time where you would have been under the bed cleaning dust bunnies to instead contact 3 more warm leads to invite them to lunch. Time much better spent. I’d give you the name of mine as a referral but am afraid she’d be spread too thin and not have time for me. Selfish, I know, but some things are more precious than others. I do know that the team at The Maids are great though. Ask for Melissa.

5) Social Media tools. I have a confession. Social media is not my biggest strength. Other than LinkedIn, I do it because I have to, not because I want to, and I make no bones about it to my clients, as they need to do it as well. What has made it tolerable for me has been a little tool called Onlywire, which allows me to share what you’re reading right here with a load of social media and bookmarking sites instead of spending oodles of time uploading things separately when I could be interacting with folks online and off. Great for the SEO.

Hope these help you be more efficient and use your time more effectively. Now run to that networking meeting!

Suzen Pettit

www.omaginarium.com

www.omaginehealth.com

203 733 8578

Get Found, Get Heard, Get Crackin’

There is no denying that prestigious titles that come with high paying salaries bring with it certain unspoken privileges, but for members of disadvantaged groups, it also brings unspoken subliminally interpreted bias. Diversity has many dimensions but race, gender and age are probably the most predominant. The question of leadership development and how well underrepresented groups are treated in the corporate environment probably starts with how our brain processes data. The brain is a large data storage bin and with limited information on any group, such as Asians, Blacks, Hispanics, Women, Lesbians, Disabled Veterans, etcetera, it processes the data it has and categorizes people within a group as one.

This process in the field of psychology is known as cognitive categorization and makes the issues of diversity and leadership very complex within the workplace. On the surface cognitive categorization is not racist, sexist or insidious; the dangerous aspect comes into play when mental categorizations are used to prevent hiring and promotions, derail careers and make negative assumptions about individuals based on group categorization.

These are multilayered, complex issues that must be discussed because dimensions of diversity matter but according to Katz and Miller, they matter less when brought out in the open and discussed. Contrary to what we tell our children and what we want to believe, people are not blind to differences nor due do we live and work in bias free environments.

One of the ways to minimize cognitive categorization is to develop culturally diverse activities outside the workplace. If more people of diverse backgrounds socialize outside of the work environment, they would come to see the totality of the human being and no longer evaluate or judge one another through a bias lens. Notice that the President plays basketball with men of diverse cultures and backgrounds. These men from diverse backgrounds, ethnicities and cultures, call each other friend and genuinely like and respect one another.

Outside socialization gives people the opportunity to get to know one another and have fun without feeling forced or pressured to do so. So I say, hey Mr. President, where are the female basketball players? Were any invited to play? By the way, isn’t his friend Arne Duncan, Secretary of Education? Another benefit to external socialization is its great networking properties.

The problem of the diversity inclusivity dilemma becomes more apparent when you consider the data. In 2011, according to the U.S. Census, 36.6% of respondents checked minority, which is 114 million people. That percentage is expected to continually climb. Diversity inclusion is certainly a leadership challenge related to organizational growth and change because it limits how an organization hires and utilizes talent and makes the most of its workforce, and with the workforce consisting of a large population of minorities and women, this lack of inclusion will increasingly impact a company’s bottom line.

This separate and unequal corporate environment is part of America’s cultural landscape; past and present forces have shaped racial identification; cognitive processing, socio cultural in-group/out-group status and working relationships. Race, gender and age are prominent dimensions of diversity but diversity inclusion is about accepting people regardless of how they self identify or what personal idiosyncrasies or uniqueness they have—think Garcia on the hit television show Criminal Minds. Don’t judge talent by the package it comes in. According to the Bureau of Labor Statistics, by 2020, a quarter of the labor force will be baby boomers, those 55 years and older; therefore, the age dimension of diversity is something that will have to be addressed.

Diversity inclusive practices is a challenge for organizational growth because in order to achieve a work environment where all people feel that their differences are valued and respected, takes an entire organizational paradigm shift. Sigmund Freud proclaimed that we are not the rational rulers of our lives but are under the influence of unconscious forces of which we are unaware.

Leaders may not be acting with malicious forethought but in subconscious ways which are guided by internal and external social cultural influences. This is why it is critical that companies be willing and prepared to evaluate, assess and change their infrastructure, i.e., management practices and behaviors, human resource policies, and rewards, the systems that supports, validates and encourages the organization’s exclusive culture. This takes time and considerable effort.

The challenge for senior leadership is to understand in a work environment that has limited talent resources and more global competition than ever before, there is a huge need and big profit in being able to utilize a broader pool of skills, talent and perspectives that reside within the organization.

The research has spoken and diversity inclusion practices increases employee morale, lessens turnover and lawsuits, improves promotion and retention rates and improves a company’s public image. Talent management officers should address how diverse talent is being utilized, managed, mentored and groomed to succeed. How well an organization grows and develops is in large part determined by how well an organization uses its human assets.

Talk to me and let me know how you have been able to overcome some of the challenges surrounding diversity inclusion. Follow me DGSBlogger on Twitter https://twitter.com/#!/DGSBlogger

By Suzen Pettit

Not sure what I was thinking when I agreed to join a BNI (Business Networking International) group in my neighborhood, other than the idea of a networking group based solely on the idea of giving and receiving referrals, with none of the froo- froo attached to it, none of the dancing around….seemed so appealing. If you read my last post about my networking group challenges you’ll get what I’m talking about. So when my “Computer Troubleshooter” Rick Van Akin suggested that if I wanted to grow my business I should come to his BNI meeting just to “check it out” I thought, why not?

Little did I know at the time, or perhaps I just wasn’t listening, that the meetings began at 7 AM. AM? I thought he’d said PM. AM??? AM it was, and when I emailed the president to see just how formally attired I needed to be at 7 AM I was bummed out to hear that yoga pants were really not an option, unless of course I was a yoga instructor. I briefly considered switching careers. So I’d be lying if I said that I was ecstatic about attending my first meeting. Grumbling under my breath, I made it to the first meeting with seconds to spare, leaving my daughter to figure out how to get herself dressed, fed and to the school bus on her own. Third graders can do that in this country, can’t they? Kidding, she’s 11. Kidding again- she’s a teenager. Much more dangerous than a third grader.

That being said, and much to my surprise, I was blown away by the meeting. Seriously. I filled out an application and interviewed for the group, after my second visit. You’re only allowed 2 visits before having to decide, and even then there’s an application process.

Here’s my top 6 reasons why I joined the Super 7 BNI and you should join one too:

1. They mean business. And I mean business. They aren’t kidding about giving and receiving referrals. At the end of each meeting members are expected to go around the tables and with everyone witnessing, either offer a testimonial, a referral or a thank you to at least 1 person in the group. No slouchers allowed. Our eyes are all upon you.

2. You are held accountable- In a good way! Members are expected to make it to most of the weekly meetings- only 3 absences are allowed within a 6 month period without obtaining a substitute. It’s a structured group (although we do manage to have fun…). Commitment is expected of the group, and it pays off. If you are perceived as being serious about giving and receiving business referrals, and about satisfying customers that have been referred to you, business leads follow. Performing quality work is an expectation. After all, you need to look at these people in the eye at 7 AM each and every week. Therefore the weeding is taken care of, and a good group will end up with quality professionals who they can feel confident referring to their network. And parents.

3. The motto, originated by BNI founder Ivan Misner is that “Givers Gain”. Who doesn’t love that? Instead of the typical networking and “salesy” philosophy of “what can you do for me today”, in BNI we switch things up to a much more Buddhist way of thinking, in that if you are always thinking of ways, and of people to “give” business to, eventually it will come around. And 9 out of 10 times it does. Truly. Try doing it in your own life outside of a BNI and you will prove this to yourself. Give selflessly. It’s Karma, baby.

4. We get to hone our presentation skills: At every meeting folks get an opportunity to give a 60 second elevator speech (hate that term) about what a good lead would be for them that day, and at each meeting the members rotate an opportunity to give a “marketing minute” and a 10 minute presentation where they really get to present their “thang”. Why should someone hire this person? You’ll find out at the 10 minute presentation, and you’ll have a chance to really hone your delivery. Great presentation skill building. Who needs Toastmasters?

5. Only one professional of each profession allowed per group. If you’re admitted into the group, you are the sole financial advisor, life insurance agent, realtor, etc., which obviously encourages referrals. It’s easy to form strategic alliances and spheres of influences this way. Again, accountability is key however. We’re all counting on quality work being performed as it reflects back on us.

6. We’re out by 8:30 AM with the day in front of us. The funny thing is, most of us have a lot to talk about after the meeting and don’t want to go. If you’re lucky you’ll get into a great group like ours, who really enjoy one another’s company and use the power of BNI to grow our businesses both on site and off.

I’m really happy this great group of professionals allowed me to grace them with my presence. I’ve never looked back, gladly pay the dues, and in the one short year that I’ve been a member it has helped grow my business exponentially. Who couldn’t use that?

Suzen Pettit
www.omaginarium.com
www.omaginehealth.com
203 733 8578
Get Found, Get Heard, Get Crackin’

…  That Can Immediately Blow Your Chance To Connect With Your Audience

As a seasoned host, I have interviewed great guests and some poor ones.

Below are five of the fastest ways to alienate and turn off your audience.

1. Over-pitching instead of adding value.

Have you ever listened to a program that was really a giant commercial for the guest? Hosts want guests who deliver high quality content in an entertaining way. Interviews provide initial introductions to new people. The more value you provide the more attractive you become to listeners who might become customers, clients, and raving fans who become fabulous referral resources.

2. Withholding – not sharing tips people can implement.

I call these teasers when guests allude to something useful and are reluctant to share more. Withholding can alienate your audience by suggesting that if they want to receive something of value from you, they will have to pay for it. Coming into an interview with a sincere desire to be of service to helping others succeed is one surefire way to make you memorable. In today’s economy, making heart connections is the new language of relationship building and a powerfull way to build instant rapport with your audience.

3. Using jargon or industry specific language.

Keep your message and information easy to understand. I once had a guest refer to a specific assessment tool that he successfully used with clients. I stopped briefly to explain what the assessment was so listeners weren’t confused. Be attentive to presenting information that might require a brief explanation or example to make your point.

4. Rambling.

Have you ever listened to someone who was long-winded or went off on tangents? Rambling comments can quickly cost you audience attention by showing you as unprepared and can diminish your credibility as a guest or expert. And radio shows vary in length with many guest booked for individual segments. You may only have five minutes to make your points and leave a positive impression with listeners!

5. Distracting speech patterns such as too many uhms & ya knows.

Some may be unconscious habits and trendy words or phrases. When overused (every other word, how you begin each sentence, a consistent way of responding without variation in a conversation), they can cost you the audience attention, dilute your message, and be very off putting.

Bottom Line: Always consider your audience.

Get clear on your expectations and intentions for the interview including your reasons for doing them in the first place. Let go of any attachments to the outcome, show up to share your brilliance and have fun. They’ll love you for it!

To your success in bringing your passion and message out into the world!

Lorraine Cohen is the Founder of Powerfull Living, Reverend Dr. Lorraine Cohen is a gifted spiritual life coach, popular broadcaster, published writer, and in demand inspirational speaker. For more than 25 years, Lorraine has coached thousands of conscious women business owners and transformational catalysts to overcome the limitations of their mind and fears, to know their value, and bring their message to a global audience while creating a prosperous life. Learn more about Lorraine at www.powerfullliving.biz and check out her 5-week Radio & Teleseminar Homestudy program to help you become a knock-your socks off guest! www.beagreatradioguest.com

To Increase Your Visibility and Your Success Starting Today

Tired of just being another business, another CEO, another sales representative? Want to be known as an expert and have businesses calling you to buy your products or services? Want to be the “go to” person for your industry? Want to be the top income producing sales person in route to the company paid vacation of your dreams?

Who do people gravitate to for business or advice? The answer – an expert. Ok, so you are thinking experts are well-known for their vast experience and they are highly visible. You are probably thinking that you don’t want to wait another five, ten, or fifteen years to gain expert status.

So, what if you could have some quick and easy ways to become an –

INSTANT EXPERT.

HAVE INSTANT VISIBILITY.

BE AN INSTANT SUCCESS.

Over the last several years, I have researched, read, asked questions, observed and basically made it my mission to find out how people become instant experts.

Here are the four (4) keys of those who are experts.

They Know Their Stuff. And, you probably do also. But experts know their business in a different way. They know statistics and interesting facts that relate to what’s happening in the overall business climate TODAY. They are able to tell interesting stories intermingled with hard factual statistics. They marry the “emotion” of the story with the “logic” of the facts. All purchasing decisions (100%) are either made with emotion or with logic or a combination of the both. So, within a few short sentences of a story, experts are able to connect at 100%. Experts can create a “purchase need” where none existed.

How do you put this all together? Well, you already know or at the very least know where to find the factual data you need. Take a few minutes and jot down a list of relevant examples to back up your facts. Now, just put them together like you are telling a story to an old friend. If you are new to this or feel uncomfortable, then write out the stories and factual data pretending you are writing a story about your industry or business. You may want to practice the story several times a day in the beginning or practice with a trusted friend or spouse. Then start trying it out as you begin meeting people. Gage their reaction to you and your story, and then adjust it until you get the reaction that you want. It’s that simple.

They Use Media. Stedman Graham (think Oprah) was asked if he had to bundle Oprah’s entire success into just one word, what would the word be? He responded with the word “media”. The more people you can reach to learn about your product or service, the more likely you are to make a sale. For the most part, as business people, we confuse media with advertising. There is a significant difference in the meaning of the terms. Traditional advertising such as newspaper ads, television commercials, radio spots, website banners, trade magazine ads, are all very effective, but are also very expensive. But, media does not equate to advertising. A timely article in the local newspaper costs you nothing. A feature article in your trade magazine costs you nothing. An interview on TV regarding an interesting topic costs you nothing. An interview on your local radio station costs you nothing, but your media exposure ($$$ value) is beyond measure.

To begin getting media exposure, start by writing an article for your local newspaper. Watch and listen to current news stories and find a good match for your expertise with the news stories of the day. For example, during the Gulf oil spill about a year ago, if your company did research on marine wildlife you could have written an article about how marine wildlife were effected by petroleum based products; or if your business was in human psychology, then you could have written a story on how people deal with crisis situations and offer suggestions that would have benefited those that are affected by disasters. Depending on your business, you could talk with the local newspaper and ask if they would be interested in running a series of articles about something your company specializes in – for example, if you are a financial planner, then you might suggest that you write a series of articles about how the changes in the new laws affect people’s retirement. You can also do the same for radio shows. Radio stations are always looking for new people to interview about relevant events. If you are scheduled to speak at an event, then you can invite your local media to attend the event or at the very least do an interview with you about the topic you will be presenting at the meeting. You can easily find a list of your current media contacts by doing a quick internet search. Be creative.

They Leverage Their Time. We all are familiar with ROI (return on investment), but how many of us understand the concept of ROT (return on time)? Here’s an example: a financial planner was doing an average job of getting new clients, but she was frustrated at only being able to write so many new clients a day until she started using the power of leveraged time. Instead of contacting one or two potential new clients per day – otherwise known as cold calling or sometimes warm calling (a referral), she decided to leverage her time and attract clients that wanted her services. She worked out a partnership with another similar, but not competitive, businesses and set up local informational programs of 20-25 people per session who were seeking information and knowledge about investments and retirement planning. So instead of cold-calling for several hours a day, she spent time with 20-25 people per session who were interested in financial planning services. Think about it, who would be building their client portfolio faster- the person who does one to two cold calls per day or the person who is getting 20-25 hot lead per hour? This lady is now one of the top six (6) professional financial planners in the United States.

A good question to ask is “what action will put me closest to the money?” Experts value their time and they understand the value of their time. This means that you must take a good, hard look at how you are spending your time right now. Start spending your time on things that are critical to your success and ditch, delegate, or revamp everything else.

They Are Visible. Visibility is visibility and it can be achieved in many different ways. You can have your own website (or a special page attached to your company’s website with more detailed information about you, with your company’s permission of course), you can belong to LinkedIn, Twitter, or Face Book or other internet social networking sites. You can write articles for local papers or your trade industry. You can write a special report and email it to your existing clients or others who you want to become your clients. You can write an article for internet dispersion (vertical marketing) that can be picked up by newspapers, TV and radio stations, or anyone who writes blogs or e-zines with a link back to you, the expert. You can quickly become a speaker at local events or within your trade industry. All you need to do is pick interesting and timely topics. Most meeting and conference planners are looking for speakers.

Another way to increase your visibility is to be nominated for awards and then announce that you have been nominated for the award. Don’t be afraid to nominate yourself for an award, that’s actually the way most people get nominated. Then announce again if you win the award.

Also, add to the back of your business card when reprinted (or add a clear label to your current card with key words or a personal tag line you want your customers to remember). One of the best ones I have seen is a regional pharmaceutical representative whose tag line is “I Sell Drugs”. I have only met him once in my life and that was several years ago, but still to this day, I can picture his face and I would know him anywhere, anytime, and I would know exactly what he sells. This is an extreme example, but you get the point.

Now, I always like to give more than I promise. So here’s a bonus tip.

Experts Get Invited to do Joint Ventures: By using these four (4) keys, you can quickly obtain expert status.

Your next step after becoming “an expert” is incredible business opportunities through joint venturing. Joint ventures are business partnership created with reputable business people that create a win-win situation for both businesses as well as their customers. Remember, the theory of six degrees of separation. What used to be considered “pie in the sky” or “unthinkable partnerships” for businesses are within the reach of all businesses today. Joint ventures offer new ways of introducing your product to new markets or through new marketing channels. For example, a lady who wrote a simple little book of the 100 reasons she was glad to have her Mom, through a series of introductions, did a joint venture with one of the largest gift card companies as part of their Mother’s Day offer. The lady received a check for six figures and the gift card company had a huge “special promotion — gift with purchase” for their customers. The gift card company also made a huge profit on the venture.

As an expert your opportunities are endless – paid speaking engagements – authoring a book, being sought after for interviews on national TV, being contracted for prime consulting assignments, or a vast multitude of other incredible opportunities.

Don’t wait to become an expert. Try these four (4) simple ways to gain the status of “expert” almost overnight.

Debra J. “Debbie” Cunningham is the President and CEO of Evergreen Business Strategies located in Williamstown, WV. She is a certified business coach and consultant providing strategic guidance for business owners who want to make huge leaps in their business and personal revenue and in their lifestyles. Visit her website at www.evergreen-business-strategies.com for a list of upcoming programs and F.R.E.E. resources including “15 Quick and Easy Ways to Increase Your Visibility Right Now!

By Yvonne DiVita

The phrase “Resistance is Futile” comes from the old Star Trek TV series. In it, the Borg, described in Wikipedia as “a fictional pseudo-race of cybernetic organisms,” travel the universe with the goal of assimilating other races into their “hive”. Their success rate is legendary.

It’s Futile to Resist… women shoppers

I maintain that women are the New Borg. We have the power and the reach to assimilate any and all products and services – and if you do not bend to our will, we will take our handbags and wallets and embrace (assimilate) your competitors.

Technology is one reason we’re able to do this. Technology, via social media, has given us a way to connect with each other across vast distances. It’s enabled us to talk to each other, all day, every day, about … well, anything. But, the reality is much simpler. Women like to share. We used to meet at the village well – to gossip and chat and share childcare or marriage advice. We used to have coffee klatches where we would share baking recipes and more. Today, we have blogs and twitter and Facebook, and we do the very same things there that we did at the well or in coffee klatches, but today – our power has grown exponentially by virtue of the size of our networks. And today, we also talk business.

Think of it this way, women shop after dropping the kids off at soccer practice, or in front of their computer, after the kids are in bed. Their weapon is the click of a mouse, their power is infinite – each one of them is connected to hundreds of others, who are connected to hundreds of others, and on and on, to infinity. There is nothing cybernetic about them, but they control your whole world with their fingertips; your business success, your product development, even what kind of car you drive. They watch what you do, what you say, and how you treat their friends. And they gather in flocks to talk about you – day after day. To ignore them is futile!

Accepting women as the New Borg is not as hard or as scary as it sounds. A recent report by One Up Web, showed that in 2008, 94.1 million blog readers and 55 million users on Facebook were creating “earned content” (content not bought like traditional advertising also sometimes referred to as user-generated content) and attracting the major search engines in a big way. One Up Web noted that is it no longer enough to optimize your website – now you must optimize “your online presence.” If search has been assimilated—how can you resist?

It’s time to accept that user-generated content makes the ultimate decision on who you are. And Google listens! http://www.oneupweb.com/landing/09_searchhaschanged/ It’s time to understand that women are a masters at user-generated content. Women from all walks of life; mommy bloggers, professionals, consultants, cooks, physicians, and more. These are women who have a lot to share and could be sharing you and your business, if you but give them the right opportunity to do so.

Customer Engagement: SOP in a Web 2.0 World

This does not mean you should jump on the social media bandwagon with both feet, eyes closed in fear, as it careens down the bumpy path of authenticity and open, honest conversations. It does not mean thinking “pink” or adding a “for women only” link to your services page. It means working with professionals who can teach you best practices, work with you to establish measurable ROI (yes, there is a measurable ROI to social media), and ultimately, guide you through that learning curve, relevant to the ways women are gathering online. Lesson One: You must be willing to talk with your women customers, not at them. Take the time to learn how your women customers are using social media tools. Engage them where they are, not where you’d like them to be. http://www.booksblogsandbeyond.com/2009/03/following-a-leader-into-web-20.html

Cheap and Free, it’s Not

In a February 2009 article for Businessweek Online, social media expert, BL Ochman debunked six media myths surrounding social media. Her #1 myth, “Social media is cheap, if not free” stands out as a prime misconception about social media (which is why it’s #1, of course!).

According to BL, the tools of engagement – the YouTubes, the Flickrs, the Nings, the Diggs and their like – offer free versions, indeed. But, to what end, one must ask? Her answer: “…integrating these tools into a corporate marketing program requires skill, time, and money. The budget for an effective social media marketing campaign begins at $50,000 for two to three months.”

That’s two to three months of work – not a week of throwing up a blog, followed by a week of showing off your VP of Sales singing “High Hopes” on YouTube. It’s dedicating time and resources – to learning how to approach and embrace women online. If you accept that it’s futile to resist, that women are now and will always be a positive focus for your business, you are on the path to success. Ignore this growing voice online to your own detriment. They will discover your lack of attention. And they will tell Google – which will ultimately make you invisible.

It’s time to stop whining about the economy. Think, instead, about women and marketing and how they’re so comfortable online. Know that women want to work with you, buy what you sell – just on their terms, not yours. Put yourself in their hands and watch your profits soar. It’s truly futile to resist a compelling force that can work wonders for you – if you just let it!

In addition to being one of the 100 Women in Ecommerce for 2012, Yvonne DiVita is President, Windsor Media Enterprises, Inc. Visit her at Lipsticking, a blog about Marketing to Women Online www.lipsticking.com and follow her on twitter: @lipsticking

By Marsha Friedman

We recently lost a legend, boxing coach and trainer Angelo Dundee, the cornerman for world heavyweight champ Muhammad Ali.

I’m a huge fan of world championship boxing – and boxing doesn’t get huger than Ali!

He was one of the great athletes who relied on “Angie” to advise him in the ring. Neither Ali nor Sugar Ray Leonard, both powerful and gifted, were crazy enough to think they could win all by themselves.

And yet, look at how many of us make that very mistake!

I published Celebritize Yourself in the spring of 2009. At the time, I’d been in public relations for nearly 19 years. My book was a how-to, based on my experience, for building yourself as an expert in your field – an expert celebrity, if you will. Part of the method in my book is how to get lots of media exposure and how to be a great guest. Hello!? Of course I didn’t need anyone’s help with media for Celebritize Yourself! And even if I thought I did, how foolish would that look – the PR expert getting help with her PR?

But the reality is, we all need a coach. Ali and Leonard needed Coach Dundee. Giants quarterback Eli Manning needed Coach Tom Coughlin on Super Bowl Sunday. Tiger Woods has a swing coach and he had a life coach, his dad Earl Woods. Judging from the way things turned out after the elder Woods passed away, Tiger still needed a life coach.

When I set out to develop my media message for Celebritize Yourself, I found it a much bigger challenge than I’d expected. What comes completely naturally for me in helping clients was not at all natural when it came to my own book. Spending months immersed in writing will do that to a person. I became so involved in writing, I had a hard time stepping back and objectively assessing the options.

So I called my good friend Lee Habeeb, a media coach to many of the stars of talk radio: Michael Medved, Mike Gallagher, Dennis Prager, Hugh Hewitt and Bill Bennett.

Lee readily came to my rescue – and assured me that getting some coaching for my own book promotion was not only quite all right, it was essential. We spent many hours discussing critical messages he saw in Celebritize Yourself that I never would have spotted on my own – being too blinded by the trees to have any view of the forest. We worked on sound-bite answers and alternate ways to get my message out. He shared experiences from his days as executive producer of The Laura Ingraham Show, when guests would be cut short because of how boring they were or their infomercial approach. All good lessons from a pro.

So often I’ve heard writers and entrepreneurs, some of whom have spent years on their projects, say they plan to “handle the marketing” alone after they’ve finally finished. That’s like entering a crowded playing field wearing blinders. When you’re so close to what you’ve created, when you’ve been living with it in your head for so long, it’s difficult to see the full spectrum of marketing angles and possibilities.

Your novel about brothers fighting against each other in the Civil War could also make you the perfect person to talk about patriotism, family, fraternal bondsand the importance of standing up for personal convictions.

Your supplement for joint pain could be a springboard for a Valentine’s Day talk radio discussion of enjoying romance despite chronic pain; it could become an article with tips for exercises to supplement the supplement; it could even turn into a story about active grandparenting.

After you’ve poured heart and soul into a book, product or business, at the very least, get some coaching from friends who know your project, or fellow writers and entrepreneurs who have had their own successes. Best of all would be finding people with experience in the media. Brainstorm the possibilities for publicizing your effort and you’ll soon see the potential for angles and messages that are far greater than you might have imagined alone.

If you’ve set high goals and you’re serious about the results, consider hiring a professional. It worked for Muhammad Ali!
Marsha Friedman is a 21-year veteran of the public relations industry and a sought after national public speaker on the power of publicity. She is the founder and CEO of EMSI Public Relations (www.GuaranteedNationalPR.com), a national firm that provides PR strategy, promotion and publicity services to corporations, entertainers, authors and professional firms. Marsha is also the author of the book, Celebritize Yourself: The 3-Step Method to Increase Your Visibility and Explode Your Business. When she is not running her business, she has Cherish the Children, a non-profit foundation that helps under-privileged local foster children.

10 Things You Need to Know (Now!) About Successful Networking

Many people spend a lot of time and energy trying to make effective business connections, only to find that their networking is not working. Vickie Milazzo shares her insight on how to build meaningful relationships with the right people.

In the business world, we’re often advised to network. Interested in changing careers? Network! Need to attract some new clients? Network! Wish you had a knowledgeable mentor? Network! The fact is, networking is a valuable and effective tool that can enrich and advance your career…when you use it properly. The problem, according to Vickie Milazzo, is that many of us are wasting our time with a type of networking that is not working.

“I see many people investing a lot of time and energy into meeting new people and making those people like them,” says Milazzo, author of the New York Times bestseller Wicked Success Is Inside Every Woman.  “The problem is, they’re making connections with the wrong people or they’re approaching the right people the wrong way…or both!”

Milazzo has a great deal of experience on which to base her observations. As the founder and CEO of a multi-million dollar company, she didn’t achieve her current level of success by having breakfast with the same 16 people every Wednesday. She cultivated selective relationships with careful planning.

“I started my professional life as a nurse, and I later started a company that consults with attorneys on medical-related cases,” Milazzo recalls. “People often comment that I must have known a lot of attorneys when I started my business, but the truth is, I didn’t. I didn’t live in their neighborhoods or get invited to their parties. What I did do was reinvent traditional networking.

“To see good results, you need to know what type of person can help you and where you can meet these individuals,” she explains. “You also need to build meaningful relationships once you do meet the right people. It’s all about being smart and being selective.”

If you’re ready to put an end to “not”working and see the results you want, read on for five of Milazzo’s tips:

Don’t just socialize—select. Perhaps because the strategy is so ubiquitous, many people confuse networking with simply being friendly. Any time you meet new people and make new connections, the thinking goes, you’re adding on to your social circle and thus networking. But according to Milazzo, that line of thought is stretching it a little thin. True networking isn’t “just” hanging out and being friendly—it’s meeting the right people.

“Once again, I want to stress the importance of being selective when you’re trying to network,” she says. “Think about it: you can chat and laugh and make friends all day—and that’s great for your social life. But unless your new buddies are also connected to you professionally, your efforts won’t have an effect on your resume. Remember, successful people are selective about where and with whom they network. They don’t expect a block party to change their businesses. Instead, they research what they need, they locate its source, and then they connect.”

Make sure your group makes sense. Understanding that the neighbors’ cocktail party isn’t an opportunity to network is Step One. Step Two is realizing that even among professionals, you must still continue to be selective. In other words, you won’t necessarily find the people you need at your typical networking social hour. You must create a personalized network of colleagues, clients, consultants, vendors, and acquaintances on whom you can depend to give you anything from information to referrals.

Get outside your comfort zone. Generally, we tend to gravitate toward people who are similar to us: people who think similarly, who find similar things fun, and who are in similar walks of life. That’s fine when it comes to your friendships, but you need to aim higher when it comes to networking. Over 60 percent of people find jobs through networking, for example, and you can bet that most of them didn’t achieve this goal because they knew someone at the bottom of the pecking order.

“No, I’m not advocating snobbery,” Milazzo clarifies. “It’s normal to gravitate toward people who are the same as you—but in business, one of the main reasons why people don’t get ahead is that the don’t get out of their groups. Make every effort to meet people who are a rung or two higher than you on the professional ladder. If you impress someone who is more successful than you are, they’ll have a lot more influence than someone whose position is equivalent with yours.”

Know when to move on. You’ve heard of beating a dead horse…but when it comes to networking, that saying could be amended to “mining a dead prospect.” In other words, no matter how selective you were on the front end, don’t make the mistake of giving any particular individual or group all of your time if you aren’t seeing results or getting quality advice.

Instead of casting a wide net, go after individual fish. When you cast a wide net, you might garner a large number of possible contacts, but chances are you won’t be able to spend enough time building a relationship with each of them in order to make it a worthwhile networking experience. “However, when you try to hook individual fish, focusing on one or two specific contacts at a time, you can build stronger, more meaningful relationships,” says Milazzo. “You’ll get to know their wants and needs and they’ll have a better understanding of yours.”

Develop a system for keeping up with details. How often have you attended a conference or other event, met a bunch of different people, and then returned home without cultivating any of those relationships? In fact, you probably went right into planning mode for the next event on your schedule. “Instead, put the information you learn from and about people to work,” advises Milazzo. “There are tons of apps and other software available today that can help you keep up with important details about people immediately after you meet them. When you meet someone knew, take note (electronically) of what the person looked like, what you discussed, and one or two things you found unique about that person. That way the next time you speak with him or if you want to reach out after the event, you can mention something that will personally interest him, allowing you to make a stronger, more lasting connection.”

Manage the follow up. Rubbing elbows at one or two events with a new contact does not automatically create a beneficial relationship. How you follow up with that contact is just as important as how you made your first impression. “When you do check in with a new contact, find a way to create value,” recommends Milazzo. “Send her an article that you think might interest her or connect her with someone you know who might be a potential new customer for her or who might be able to help her with her business. Tell her you recently put a piece of her advice to work, and thank her for her valuable insight on the matter. When you do these things, you create reasons to stay in touch and that’s a great way to keep the relationship growing.”

Don’t wait until you need something to follow up. Remember, the new relationships you’re forging aren’t all about you trying to get anything and everything you can out of your contacts. Be careful that you’re not constantly reaching out to them always asking for this or that. “Show how you can benefit the person as well,” says Milazzo. “Simply waiting until you need something to reach out to the person will make him feel like you’re taking advantage of him.”

Network outside social media. While networking through social media is an important way to make a connection, it’s not the only way to maintain it. You can’t and shouldn’t depend on millions of LinkedIn connections and Facebook friends to do the trick. “Simply having an online connection with a huge group of people is not going to drive that much action for you,” notes Milazzo. “You have to connect with social media connections offline in order to really form meaningful relationships with them. Write them letters or thank you notes. Heck, actually pick up the phone and call them! A colleague recently told me that she met with a high level businessperson who told her he calls four different people in his network every morning just to reach out and see how they’re doing. The lesson learned? You simply can’t lose when you create a systematic way for staying in touch!”

Give as much as you get. Successful networking is a two-way street. Most of us start by asking for help and advice, but as we become more knowledgeable and successful, we gain the means to help others. Remember, success isn’t a monopoly: the more creative, intelligent, and effective people there are, the more successful your entire industry will be. Whenever possible, give younger (or at least more inexperienced) people a piece of advice or a leg up whenever you can.

“Ultimately, taking ‘not’working to networking isn’t difficult—it simply requires you to be smart about who you’re spending your time with. Always engage in powerful and meaningful networking, not just a pocketful of business cards and a glass of cheap white zinfandel. And never stop expecting high performance from your network—if it’s not productive move on!”

Vickie Milazzo, RN, MSN, JD, is the author of the New York Times bestseller Wicked Success Is Inside Every Woman WickedSuccess.com). From a shotgun house in New Orleans to owner of a $16-million business, Milazzo shares the innovative suc¬cess strategies that earned her a place on the Inc. list of Top 10 Entrepreneurs and Inc. Top 5000 Fastest-Growing Companies in America.

She is also the author of the Wall Street Journal bestseller Inside Every Woman: Using the 10 Strengths You Didn’t Know You Had to Get the Career and Life You Want Now.

Personal connection, likeability, and trustworthiness are back. They are the new litmus test for doing business. Author and consultant Andrew Sobel says we create these qualities not by knowing the right answers, but by knowing the right questions.

Just a few years ago, globalization was in full swing, and the world seemed to be bursting with an infinite supply of business. All this bounty lulled us into taking our customers for granted, maintains Andrew Sobel—until the economy tanked and shattered the illusion of endless prosperity. Suddenly, the old-fashioned “trusted relationship” started to look good again.

“In this post-Madoff era of unpredictability and suspicion, people are looking for deeper, more intimate, and more engaged relationships—the kind that reduce risk,” says Sobel, author (along with coauthor, Jerold Panas) of Power Questions: Build Relationships, Win New Business, and Influence Others (Wiley, February 2012, ISBN: 978-11181196-3-1, $22.95) and three other books on long-term business relationships.

“This is true of customers but also vendors, employees, and other business partners,” he adds. “The days of getting in, making money, and moving on to the next guy are over. When times are tough and the future is uncertain, people want to put down roots and partner with people they truly like and trust.”

Bottom line: In today’s markets, the most valuable commodity is the ability to connect with others and rapidly build trust. And that begins by asking the right questions.

“Asking questions and letting people come up with their own answers is far more effective than spouting facts or trying to talk someone into something,” Sobel explains. “Telling creates resistance. Asking creates relationships.”

In his book Sobel explores dozens of questions that light fires under people, challenge their assumptions, help them see problems in productive new ways, and inspire them to bare their souls (which, of course, strengthens the bonds in the relationship).

Here are nine ways questions can transform professional and personal relationships:

• Questions turn one-dimensional, arms-length business relationships into personal relationships that endure for years. “When a relationship is all business and there is no real personal connection, it lacks heart and soul,” says Sobel. “And therefore you are a commodity—a kind of fungible expert-for-hire. A client—or your boss—can trade you out for a new model with no remorse or emotion. But when you’ve connected personally, the situation is transformed because clients stick with people they like. Bosses hold on to team members they feel passionately about. Your expertise and competence get you in the door, but it’s the personal connection that then builds deep loyalty.”

Sobel tells the story of a senior partner in a top consulting firm who had to meet with the CEO of a major client. Other consultants were nipping at their heels to get more business from this company. This powerful, confident CEO, who was in his 60s and near retirement, had seen hundreds of consulting reports. At the end of a routine briefing, the senior partner paused and asked the CEO, “Before we break up, can I ask you a question?” The CEO nodded. The partner said, “You’ve had an extraordinary career. You have accomplished so much, starting at the very first rung of the ladder, on the manufacturing floor. As you look ahead—is there something else you’d like to accomplish? Is there a dream you’ve yet to fulfill?”

The CEO was nearly stunned. He thought for a moment and replied, “No one has ever asked me that question. No one.” And then he began talking about a deeply held dream he had for his retirement. That question was the turning point in building a long-term, deeply personal relationship with an influential business leader.

• They make the conversation about the other person—not about them. Most of us don’t care what other people think—we want to know first if they care about us. The need to be heard is one of the most powerful motivating forces in human nature. That’s why one of Sobel’s power questions is, What do you think? Another is, Can you tell me more?

“There’s an anecdote I love about a woman who has dinner, in the same month, with two great rival British statesmen of the 19th century, Gladstone and Disraeli,” says Sobel. “When asked to compare the two men she says, ‘After my dinner with Mr. Gladstone, I thought he was the cleverest man in the world.’ And then she adds, ‘After my dinner with Mr. Disraeli, I felt as though I were the cleverest woman in all of England!’

“When you make the conversation all about you, others may think you are clever,” he adds. “But you will not build their trust. You will not learn about them. You will squander the opportunity to build the foundations for a rich, long-term relationship.”

• They cut through the “blah, blah, blah” and create more authentic conversations. No doubt you can relate to this scenario. A person says, “I want to bounce something off you.” Then, he proceeds to spend ten minutes telling you every detail of a very convoluted situation he is enmeshed in. You do yourself and the other person a favor by getting him to focus on the true kernel of his issue. Simply ask: What is your question?

“This is a tough-love question,” admits Sobel. “People will resist it—often strenuously. But you must ask it. It forces them to take the first step toward clarifying what the issue is and what advice they really need from you. You’ll reduce the amount of posturing people do and will move faster toward an authentic conversation.”

• They help people clarify their thinking and “get out of the cave.” The ancient Greek philosopher Socrates said that we perceive reality as if we are chained inside a dark cave. In that cave, we see only the blurred shadows of life outside the cave as they are projected on a dark wall at the back. Our understanding of reality is filtered and distorted.

By asking a series of questions, Socrates would engage his students’ minds in the learning process. In this way he uncovered assumptions and slowly but surely got to the heart of the issue. The “Socratic Method” is still used at Harvard Business School—and it can enable you to help others see the true reality instead of shadowy representations of it.

Instead of saying, “We need to improve our customer service!” Sobel suggests asking: “How would you assess our customer service levels today?” Or, “How is our service impacting our customer retention?” If someone at work says, “We need more innovation,” ask, “Can you describe what innovation means to you? How would we know if we had more of it?” Or if there is a call for more teamwork, ask, “What do you mean when you say ‘teamwork’?”

• They help you zero in on what matters most to the other person. The next time you’re talking to someone and realize you’ve “lost” her—she’s fidgeting, she’s stopped asking questions, maybe she’s sneaking glances at the clock—ask this question: What is the most important thing we should be discussing today? You will instantly connect with what really matters to her—and the conversation that ensues will help her see you as relevant and valuable.

“Even if your agenda doesn’t get met, hers will,” asserts Sobel. “And then she will want to enthusiastically reciprocate. In business it’s critical to be seen as advancing the other person’s agenda of essential priorities and goals. When time is spent together on issues that are truly important to both parties, the relationship deepens and grows.”

• They help others tap into their essential passion for their work. One of the highest-impact power questions you can ask is, Why do you do what you do? It grabs people by the heart and motivates them. When they seriously consider and answer this question, the room will light up with passion. Dull meetings will transform into sessions that pop with energy and generate ideas that vault over bureaucratic hurdles and create real impact.

“We do things for many reasons,” writes Sobel. “But when you put ‘should’ in front of those reasons, you can be certain all the pleasure and excitement will soon be drained away. No one gets excited about should. In contrast, when you unveil the true why of someone’s work and actions—when you get them to start sentences with ‘I love to’ or ‘I get excited when’—you will find passion, energy, and motivation.”

• They inspire people to work at a higher level. The late Steve Jobs was notorious for pushing employees. He asked people constantly, Is this the best you can do? It’s a question that infused Apple’s corporate culture from the beginning. It’s one that helped revolutionize the desktop computing, music, and cellular phone industries. And it’s one that you can use too—sparingly and carefully—when you need someone to stretch their limits and do their very best work.

“Often, we settle for mediocrity when we need to do our best,” reflects Sobel. “Mediocrity is the enemy of greatness. Asking, Is this the best you can do? helps others achieve things they did not believe possible.”

• They can save you from making a fool of yourself. Before responding to a request or answering someone’s question to you, it’s often wise to get more information about what the other person really wants. When a potential employer says, “Tell me about yourself,” you can bore them to tears by rambling on and on about your life—or you could respond by asking, “What would you like to know about me?” When a prospect asks, “Can you tell me about your firm?” the same dynamic applies. Most people go on and on about their company, but the client is usually interested in one particular aspect of your business, not how many offices you have in Europe. Ever seen someone answer the wrong question? It’s painful to watch. Asking a clarifying question can save you huge embarrassment.

“A potential client asked me for the names of three references to call,” Sobel tells us. “Instead of running around and drumming up the names, I pushed back, and asked, ‘What particular information are you seeking? Any references I give you are only going to rave about me!’ It turned out the prospect had no interest in actual references. And in fact, had she called my past clients under that pretense, it could have been potentially embarrassing to me for them to make such a big deal about a small speaking engagement. What she really wanted to understand was how other clients of mine had tackled the organizational resistance she was expecting. This question—and the subsequent conversation—turned a small lead for a keynote speech into a major, year-long project.”

• They can salvage a disastrous conversation. Sobel’s coauthor, Jerry Panas, recalls the time he asked a man named Allan for a million-dollar donation to his alma mater’s College of Engineering. Though he knew better, the author failed to gain rapport and explore Allan’s true motivations before jumping in with the big request. When Allan rebuked him for his presumptuousness, Panas realized he had made a serious error. He apologized, left the room, and twenty seconds later knocked on the door and asked the power question, Do you mind if we start over?

Start over they did, and Panas ultimately discovered that Allan might indeed be interested in making a gift—but to the University’s theater program, not its engineering program!

“Things like this happen all the time in business—and at home,” reflects Sobel. “Interactions get off on the wrong foot, and someone gets angry or offended or just shuts down. But people are forgiving. They want to have a great conversation with you. Asking, Do you mind if we start over? will disarm the other person and make him smile. That smile will ease the way to a new beginning.”

One of the greatest benefits of becoming a master questioner is that it takes a lot of pressure off us, notes Sobel. It’s a huge relief to know that you don’t have to be quick, clever, or witty—that you don’t have to have all the answers.

“All business interactions are human interactions,” he says. “And part of being human is acknowledging that you don’t know everything about everything—and that you certainly don’t know everything about the other person and her needs. Questions help you understand these things more deeply.

“The right questions unleash a cascade of innermost feelings and vibrant conversations,” he adds. “They help you bypass what’s irrelevant and get straight to what’s truly meaningful. They make people like you, trust you, and want to work with you—and once you’ve achieved that, the battle is already won.”

# # #

About the Authors:

Andrew Sobel is the most widely published author in the world on client loyalty and the capabilities required to build trusted business relationships. His first book, the bestselling Clients for Life, defined an entire genre of business literature about client loyalty. His other books include Making Rain and the award-winning All for One: 10 Strategies for Building Trusted Client Partnerships. He can be reached at http://andrewsobel.com.
Jerry Panas is executive partner of Jerold Panas, Linzy & Partners, one of the world’s most highly regarded firms in the field of fundraising services and financial resource development. His firm has served over 2,500 client-institutions since its founding in 1968. Jerry’s clients comprise many of the foremost not-for-profit institutions in the world. They include every major university, museum, and healthcare center in the United States. Internationally, Jerry has advised organizations as diverse as the University of Oxford, The American Hospital in Paris, and Nuestros Pequeños Hermanos in Mexico, the largest orphanage in the world. He can be reached at http://jeroldpanas.com.

…the Love This Valentine’s Day

No matter how much they want to reward their employees, many leaders just don’t have the financial resources to give out much-deserved raises and bonuses. Fortunately, according to Todd Patkin, you don’t need to spend a cent to show your people beyond a shadow of a doubt that you care about them and appreciate their hard work. He suggests showering your employees with love this Valentine’s Day.

Valentine’s Day is usually reserved for showering love on your special someone. But if you’re in a leadership position at a company that’s been hit hard by the recession and its aftereffects, you probably already know that your employees could use some love too. In the battle for survival, your company may have developed a perpetually stressful atmosphere in which your employees have been asked to do more with less—often with little thanks. Of course, you don’t want to shortchange them (and in fact, the thought of doing so has probably worried you just as much as the economy!); you simply still can’t afford to reward them through the more traditional means of raises and bonuses.

Fortunately, says Todd Patkin, you don’t need a single dime to make your people happy at work or to show them just how much you care about them and appreciate their efforts. And what better time than Valentine’s Day to start showing them the love again.

“People will never admit it, but money is not the thing they desire most from their work. Instead, showing appreciation, respect, and, yes, even love are the three most important ways to make your people feel great about their work,” points out Patkin, author of Finding Happiness: One Man’s Quest to Beat Depression and Anxiety and—Finally—Let the Sunshine In“And happy, engaged employees are the single best way to impact your company’s bottom line.”

Patkin isn’t just a talking head—he speaks from experience. For nearly two decades, he was instrumental in leading his family’s auto parts business, Autopart International, to new heights until it was finally bought by Advance Auto Parts in 2006 for more money than he ever dreamed possible. During that time, Patkin made it his number-one priority to always put his people and their happiness first.

“As a leader, I quickly found that if my team was content and their work environment was a positive one, they would be more engaged and motivated, and they would truly care about our organization’s future,” he elaborates. “Plus, it was even more rewarding for me to see that my employees were happy—and often even ecstatic—than it was for me that we were making money.”

Patkin adds, “It’s more important now than ever before to show your employees love and appreciation, because you probably haven’t been able to give them big raises and bonuses since the recession hit. Let your employees know that this Valentine’s Day will be all about making sure they know how much you appreciate all of their hard work.”

Furthermore, Patkin adds that if your employees are perpetually stressed out, they’ll be less motivated and more disengaged. And when they’re unhappy, they’ll do only what they must to avoid chastisement…and you’ll lose money in the long term. Also, as the economy turns around, they’ll be more likely to start looking for a new job elsewhere.

“If there is one thing I would like to tell all leaders at all levels and in all industries, it’s that you have nothing to lose and everything to gain—including an improved bottom line—by making your organization as happy a place to work as possible.”

Read on for five of Patkin’s show-the-love strategies that you can use as soon as today to say “thanks for a job well done!” to any employee, any time…without spending a cent:

Send “love” notes. Writing and sending a thank-you note is standard practice when you receive a gift. And what is great, thorough work other than a gift from your people to you? When you notice that an individual has done an excellent job or has achieved an important goal, send a specific handwritten (not typed!) note conveying your most sincere appreciation and admiration. This will take only one sheet of paper and five minutes out of your day…but it’ll make a lasting impression on your employee.

“When you’re a leader, you’re busy and often overwhelmed,” Patkin acknowledges. “It’s understandable that you might overlook saying the words ‘thank you,’ much less writing them. Remember, though, that positive reinforcement and sincere gratitude will increase the respect your team has for you and will improve their opinion of your entire organization. Also, it will encourage them to likewise say ‘thank you’ more often to their own subordinates within your company. Think of writing what I call ‘love notes’ as a way to invest in your company’s atmosphere and future!”

Distribute inspiration. Our society tends to think of work as a place of drudgery, obligation, and boredom, as exemplified in the now-iconic movie Office Space. People certainly don’t think of receiving inspiration and rejuvenation between nine and five. According to Patkin, though, buoying your team’s spirits should be one of your daily goals. If you help them to see the world as a sunnier place and to improve their attitudes and ways of thinking about their entire lives, their professional and personal productivity will increase too.

“If you run across a quotation or story that inspires you, don’t keep it to yourself—pass it along to an employee, and perhaps, if appropriate, also mention that the quote or anecdote reminded you of him and his great attitude,” suggests Patkin. “Alternatively, you might consider sending out a quote or lesson of the day. Yes, the idea might sound hokey at first, but I firmly believe that most people vastly underestimate the power of feeding their minds with inspirational and educational material.”

Tell success stories. Even if they brush off praise or downplay their achievements, everybody loves to be recognized and complimented. When someone in your organization has done something great, tell her that you noticed her outstanding work, and tell the rest of the team, too! Whether correctly or incorrectly, many employees feel that their leaders take them for granted and only point out their mistakes, so make it your daily mission to prove that perception wrong.

“When I was at Autopart International and I saw that one of my people did something noteworthy, I made sure that everyone else knew about it by sending the story about her accomplishment around in an email to the entire chain,” Patkin recalls. “I could literally see the glow on the highlighted employee’s face for weeks, and I also noticed that many of the other team members now worked even harder too in order to earn a write-up themselves. Remember to always praise in public as ‘loudly as possible,’ and conversely, criticize only in private!”

Identify stars. According to Patkin, identifying stars is taking the concept behind telling success stories to the next level. Yes, recognize achievements whenever you see them, but also make celebrating your stars a regular event. Sure, some team members will roll their eyes at “Employee of the Week/Month” programs, but you can rest assured that no one is going to turn down this honor.

“Instead of singling out just one person, as a special treat for Valentine’s Day, you might even consider recognizing every member of your staff,” Patkin suggests. “For example, I always wrote about several store managers in our ‘Managers of the Month’ newsletter. Later, I included assistant managers, store supervisors, store salespeople, and our drivers in this letter of champions as well. My profiles for each star would often be a full page in length, lauding both their professional achievements and wonderful personal qualities. The newsletters themselves were often thirty pages in length when finished. But I know many within the team loved to read these personalized recognitions each month, and they motivated lots of the employees to work even harder to earn a spot on the pages themselves.

“Consider putting out a special edition of your company newsletter for Valentine’s Day or creating a newsletter for the occasion if you don’t already have one. If you have a small number of employees, include a write-up about each employee, what you love about them, and how proud you are of their accomplishments. If you have too many employees to thank them individually, include a heartfelt thank-you letter that points out what goals the company met because of all of your employees’ hard work.”

Make it a family affair. Whenever possible, engage your employees’ families when praising them. Having a leader validate all the hours each team member spends at work will be remembered far longer than a bonus (really!). Plus, when spouses and kids know what Mom or Dad does at work and are “on board” with it, your employee’s performance will be buoyed by support from the ones he or she loves the most.

“For example, if an employee did something really tremendous, I would call his home, generally trying to get the answering machine and not a person,” Patkin shares. “Then I’d leave a voicemail like this one:

“Hi, (name of spouse and kids), this is Todd Patkin from Autopart International where your husband and dad works. I just want to tell you that your husband and dad is the most incredible, wonderful, amazing person in the whole world. He just broke our Nashua, New Hampshire, store’s all-time sales record. Guys, that is incredible!! So, please, kids, do me a favor. When your dad comes home tonight, everyone run up and give him a huge hug and tell him how proud you are of him and how great he is. And, (name of spouse), I hope you too will give him a big hug and a wonderful kiss to make sure he knows how much you love him and how much he is appreciated for all he’s doing for our company. Thanks, guys.

“And in fact, years later, many employees whose families received these phone calls told me that although they didn’t remember how much their bonus checks were for that year, that extra-special homecoming was still clearly etched in their memories.”

“Trust me, showing people love, appreciation, and respect trump money just about every time when it comes to building long-term motivation and boosting employee morale and loyalty,” concludes Patkin. “If you haven’t been showing your employees appreciation, let Valentine’s Day be the time for you to get back on track, and if you have been, think of creative ways to step up your efforts. When you take the time to make your employees feel valued, they’ll know that you care about them on a more personal level, and they’ll be much happier at work. And in the end, when you’ve achieved a really positive atmosphere at work and the improved bottom line that will surely come from it, you’ll feel amazing too!”

About the Author: Todd Patkin grew up in Needham, Massachusetts. After graduating from Tufts University, he joined the family business and spent the next eighteen years helping to grow it to new heights. After it was purchased by Advance Auto Parts in 2005, he was free to focus on his main passions: philanthropy and giving back to the community, spending time with family and friends, and helping more people learn how to be happy. Todd lives with his wonderful wife, Yadira, their amazing son, Josh, and two great dogs, Tucker and Hunter.